vlad the impaler lyrics

[Chorus:] Vlad, Vlad, He could have been a sailor but he's Vlad, Vlad, Vlad the impaler Vlad, Vlad, Vlad the impaler Vlad, Vlad, He could have been a Whoaaoo Whaler could have been a Tailor, He turned out to be Norman Mailer He stepped back and he smoked a joint Twenty thousand peasants had to get the point Mommy was a hamster, Real tough childhood for such a fucking failure Daddy was a jailer He's so glad he's Vlad But you know they didn't like him because all the Turks were jerks [chorus] When he was a boy, they sent him to the Turks When Vlad returned home his wrath for his ancient foe had spurned But the ancient art of impalement was something that the boy had learned He learned, they burned and burned and burned Oh, how he learned Rotisseries of corpses turned He's so glad, oh he's so glad he's Vlad