too far down lyrics

I'm down again
And I don't know how to tell you
But maybe this time I can't come back
'Cause I might be too far down

I wish for real
That I could turn it on and off
Like hot and cold and up and down
'Cause I'm down again

I'm too far down
I couldn't begin to smile
Because I can't even laugh or cry
'Cause I just can't do it

If it was so easy to be happy
Why am I so down?
All I can do is sit and wonder
If it's going to end
Or if I should just go away forever

When I sit and think
I wish that I just could die
Or let someone else be happy
By setting my own self free

And you don't want the emotion
Because the taste it leaves is for real
But nothing's ever real until it's gone
And I might be too far down

Is this just another thrown away
Or is this the end of the whole stupid road?
But you, you wouldn't wanna know how I feel anyway
'Cause the darkest hole is at the end of the road

I'm down again
And I guess I'm not the only one
Who dreams that there's not any way to tell you
?Cause I might be too far down, too far down